Sunday, August 3, 2008

Freckle Faced at 50

Freckles, the bain of my existence since I can remember. What kid wants freckles? Not this girl. no way no how... and yet there they were, and still are some 50 years into this life of mine.

You get used to them, after awhile. Just like all the jokes and comments that are either meant to tease or comfort, 'cause well, after all what are you gonna do about them- they grow on you :)

Oh yes, there are creams to cover or hide them... staying out of the sun doesn't work either- especially if you are a rambunctious red-headed tomboy who loved being in the midst of whatever was going on, wherever.

I recently ran across some old photo's of a much younger me, and sure enough, the child me was resplendent in her grin, freckles and out of control hair... funny how not much has changed after all... despite the years of trying to conform to standards of beauty and behavior that simply didn't, well fit :)

Re-membering her.. the child/girl now a grown "mature" woman- I can't help but wish to go back and tell the younger me that it will be okay- that all the distractions and standards that define behavior and beauty are simply that, distractions. That one day she will simply learn to look in a mirror and say, "good morning beloved" and that the face reflected there is the map and legend of a life lived in spite of, as well as in tune, with the inner song and beauty we each possess.

Sometimes we forget to sing our own song, and rely on the karoake versions to carry us along. But if we stay tuned in to our inner self- the essence of who and whose we are... we begin to embrace our differences as part of our own unique offering to the mosaic of community. I have learned this the hard way, by trying to sing others words, be what others have thought or demanded, and have come to a point where I can now re-member the girlchild Jeanne and embrace her whimsy and curiousity and tenacity with confidence and giggles.... and yes the freckles too!

My new anthem is "Freckles" by Natasha Bedingfield give it a listen;

So now my freckled 50 year old face smiles, grins and carries on, much like the girlchild- only a bit slower, but still loving every minute of it !

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